Where would I be, if Jesus didn't love me?
I know where I could be. I could be divorced, alone, in jail, dead and in Hell or alive and in Hell on earth. Because Jesus loves me...He saved me from the Penalty of sin -
(The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life.)
(Romans 6:23)
I was almost 29 years old when I met Jesus personally. My life was as mixed up as can be. I was born into a family that had very mixed values. My parents were "good" people in the sense that they were hard working, generous, loving parents. We were taught not to drink, smoke, cuss, lie, tell dirty jokes or use pornography. We were taught to go to church, say our prayers, respect our elders. As long as we were children.
Once we grew up it was okay to do social drinking, smoke, cuss, tell "white" lies, laugh at dirty jokes, or enjoy pornography. Once we were adults, we didn't have to go to church, say our prayers, respect our elders or any authority.
I know that because as a child I saw and heard things like "tell them I'm not home" when they didn't want to talk to someone; or my mother telling me how, as an 18 year old, she had to lie and sneak to go out with my father against her father's wishes or as a young married woman she enjoyed flirting with men, knowing my dad would protect her if it got out of hand. I can remember well my mother's temper and being cussed at and having things thrown at me, or the time she smeared a soft-boiled egg all over my face because I changed my mind after I asked her to fix it for me. I can remember pilfering through my parent's bedroom at the age of nine and coming across some hard-core pornography. Those images still come back to haunt me when I let my guard down.
As a teenager I felt a drawing toward God, but the church I attended never told me that I was lost and could be saved. I started going to a different church at 17 but I felt that just going to church made me righteous.
I got married at 18 and little by little became the adult I was trained to be. I eventually was doing all the "grown up" things that my parents taught me, plus. Since I had been exposed to this stuff all my life, it was too tame. I had to do more to be satisfied with my life, and nobody or nothing had better stand in my way.
I became a pathological liar, a thief, an abusive parent, and a cheating wife. My life consisted of smoking, drinking, reading porn, finding friends in the same lifestyle and avoiding housework and cooking, etc...
My marriage of almost 11 yrs was a disaster, my husband had to stop for several beers on the way home to be able to put up with me and our sons. He was under conviction for 6 months before he gave in to the Holy Spirit. Those 6 months were horrible. He had various symptoms like heartburn, indigestion, palpitations, etc... He had all sorts of medical tests done and they couldn't find anything wrong. Well without giving his testimony let me just say his problems were spiritual not medical and only the Great Physician could cure what ailed him. He would lay in bed at night taking his pulse and telling me he thought he was dying. After hearing this night after night, my thoughts were "I wish he would just go ahead and die, that way I could get some sleep."
Well, he got saved and seeing the difference in him got my interest up. Two weeks later, the pastor and his wife came to visit and they were just sharing about Jesus and assumed that I was a Christian. ( I had taught Sunday School a few years before. Even though I was lost as a goose.) That night when I went to bed I kept thinking about the things they had said; and all of a sudden I realized that I was lost and on my way to Hell. That scared me so bad, that I immediately prayed and asked Jesus to save me.
He not only saved me from the Penalty of sin, He also saved me from the Power of sin
(Greater is He that is in me,than he that is in the world) ( 1 John 4:4 )
He didn't do it all at once, but little by little He started pulling the muck and the mire out of my life and replacing it with the fruit of the Spirit.
He gave me the victory to pour all of our well-stocked bar's contents down the drain.(I haven't wanted a drink since 1972.) He gave me victory over cigarettes. He gave me victory over sexual immorality of all types. He gave me victory over a lying tongue. He gave me victory over thievery. He gave me victory over my temper. He gave me victory over laziness and selfishness. Don't get me wrong, I am far from perfect and if I take my eyes off of Jesus, neglect my Bible reading and prayer time; I can backslide quicker than a greased pig. But since He has saved me from the power of sin, I can confess my sins and He forgives me and cleanses me from my unrighteousness. (1 John. 1:9 )
Our heavenly Father has blessed me in so many ways. He
healed our marriage. My 3 little boys grew up into 3 fine men who
love their parents and don't even remember the neglect and
mistreatment they suffered. The Lord blessed us with a beautiful baby
girl, Faith Christine, two and a half years after we were saved. She
and her husband have six children and they are all in church.. We
have a total of sixteen grandchildren and nine great-grandchildren.
The Lord has blessed spiritually, physically, mentally, and
financially. We have seen miracles of deliverance and healing,
miracles of provision of food and other necessities along with
spiritual blessings.
I am looking forward to being saved from
the Presence of sin
I have this glorious hope and promise of
spending eternity with the Lord.
The Lord is not a respecter
of persons. What He did for me, He will do for you.
I am learning
to put on the full armor of God everyday. (
Ephesians 6:11 )
I am also learning to take captive every
thought so that sin can not be conceived.
( 2
Corinthians 10:5 )
Living the Christian life is not
easy but God equips us with all the tools we need to live in
obedience to Him.
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but
of power and of love and of a sound mind.
( 2
Timothy 1:7 )
He gives us a special Helper or
Comforter. “If you love Me, keep My commandments. And I will
pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may
abide with you forever— the Spirit of truth, whom the world
cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you
know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you. I will not
leave you orphans; I will come to you."
(
John 14:15-18 )
No, living the Christian life is not
easy but it is rewarding, exciting and the best way to live. I tried
it for almost 29 years without the Lord in my life. I am not going
back. This butterfly likes having her wings and doesn't want to be a
creepy crawly waller in the dirt caterpillar ever again!
(
2 Corinthians 5:17 )
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Born on:
December 15, 2005 |
